Mentor & Wise Speak

IT’S ALL IN ME

“I am every Woman…. Whatever you want, you need, anything you want done baby I do it naturally. It’s all in me, in me… Yeah!”

What a song, very peppy, light and yet so meaningful.  “It’s all in me”, absolutely, isn’t it??

We often see a lot of women around us at home, work or through social media who are doing such brilliant and variety of things.  What makes them “going”… I often ask myself, why am I not doing anything different or worthwhile? I am a “Working Woman, a Working Mother” which is not bad at all, right??? Then why do I lack a sense of satisfaction/fulfillment. Am I expecting too much from life or am I being too ambitious?  Do I lack gratitude? What is it??

So….I got talking to a few of my friends, colleagues, business friends and realized that while there were some who were very clear in terms of what they wanted in life and left no stone unturned towards achieving their objective or purpose. There were some others who are equally or seemed better than the rest in terms of talent or potential, but didn’t see themselves going anywhere… why is that??

Lack of Motivation, Support, Ideas or just Kalyug????????????? Each one to their own, I guess….

Well… more than anything I felt it was the lack of continued efforts and the willingness to accept/take or seek help in channelizing one’s thoughts towards realizing or asking oneself, first “what do I REALLY want? Is it a desire or a goal??It may sound simple but it can be tough at the same time for a few of us,  while a lot of us women who are either working, are on sabbatical or are homemakers are content in their respective ways, there are many who are discontent in the same situation. This is only because “We don’t know what we are seeking”. During school, College, Work or at home we often hear about setting your goals and work towards achieving them but as we grow older, we start undermining the process of goal setting, be it professional and personal.

It’s human nature to resist change or fear failure. However in the name of playing safe we have actually set ourselves up for mediocrity. Speak to someone, identify a mentor, set goals, and see what wonders it can make to your overall thought process and well-being.

It’s all in me, yes it is! It starts with you! It starts with me….

Unless we sit down and take time to think about what we want to do with our lives, we are not going to make any head way and will subconsciously get disengaged with reality and begin giving up which is detrimental for a “Sound mind in a Sound body”.

Let’s work towards overcoming the common barriers to communication with ourselves first (taboos, emotional barriers, distractions, perceptions, differences etc) and work towards realizing our potential, realizing our dreams. Look around and you will find so many things, that will inspire you, try it! I did!

My mother learnt to drive a car is her late 50’s, something that we did not expect her to do, yet truly commendable.  It goes to show that age is no bar, where there is a will there is bound to be a way!!

Most of us are uncomfortable to allow others to see the vulnerable side of ourselves, due to our own inhibitions and therefore avoid seeking clarifications.  We need to acknowledge these inhibitions and overcome it by exploring and challenging them from time to time. One has to go through a bit of grind to find the answers to your questions.

“It’s not the winning that’s important, but the participation, not the triumph, but the struggle…”! Pierre de Coubertin

One of my neighbor who is a victim of cerebral palsy is an entrepreneur, married and is also blessed with a son. She truly is an example of “It’s all in me”. From whatever I know of her, she did not let her disabilities come in the way of leading a normal life and left no stone unturned towards overcoming emotional and social barriers and today for me she is an epitome of perseverance and that’s inspiring.

“You were never created to live depressed, defeated, guilty, condemned, ashamed or unworthy. You were created to be victorious”! Joel Osteen

 

 

About the Author

Pragati Negi Noronha, an HR professional with 13years of experience. Currently working in an Engineering, Procurement and Construction organization based out of Delhi. A native of Kumaon, was born and brought up in Chennai, happily married to a Goan and blessed with a pretty girl (18 months). Loves pets, adopted an abandoned kitten 2 years ago.

…….And I Decided to Script & Sculpt My Life!

Life is a maze, and we all are running in it, trying to figure out our way to reach that much sought after destination, Happiness. At every step, we have to choose, we have to decide, discard and adopt. 7 years ago, my life was caught in a cycle of schedules, increments, time frame and meetings. I was working hard to create a position for myself in the corporate world. Suddenly circumstances changed and I had to choose between my daughter’s needs and my corporate success. Quitting something that one has worked hard for is not easy and this abrupt change did cause identity crisis and helplessness to some extent.

And not the kinds to give up, I continued to think. One weekend, while the family was having breakfast, we got talking about my future scope and post that talk, I realized a few things:

  1. Quitting a job did not mean I was quitting my skill set.
  2. Starting a HR consultancy actually meant the ideal balance between my professional and personal responsibilities.
  3. Keeping my goals practical and taking “a step at a time” would minimize my stress level and maximize my self-utilization.
  4. I had to unlearn being a worker and learn to be an entrepreneur.
  5. I would keep the overhead as small as possible. This would again help me to reduce stress and sustain for a longer period.
  6. Quality work is the best advertisement and I shall treat each job as if it is my first assignment.

I became marketing, finance, PR and core team all rolled into one, and started my second innings. After sending my daughter off to her school, I would spend the whole day mailing proposals and calling up my old contacts to put a word about my company and asking them for further references. Initially, nothing happened, there were no results to show for my efforts, and at times I wanted to quit but I held on because deep within myself, I had complete trust in my abilities. Then, one day, I got my first client. It was a very small assignment, much smaller than any I have handled in my junior-trainee days, but it was a start never the less. Closing that first requirement, gave me a satisfaction, I have never experienced in my 12 years of corporate life, and this was the warmth of achieving something for me entirely. I am a true believer that no matter what, I shall not compromise with the quality of my work, and this always pays off. The first client gave me a referral and thus the ball got rolling. The word is spreading, and though traces of recession are still there in my field, the optimistic me just refuses to give up.

Starting something of my own also had an extra benefit. During my corporate days, I did not have any “me time”, I never realized I had some skills which were lying dormant. Now, between following up leads for my own business, I had ample amount of free time, and hence I started scribbling my thoughts across social networks. I expressed what I observe and what I feel in a simple day to day language. I loved writing and to my surprise, people started appreciating what I wrote Gradually the confidence built up and so did the length of my writings. Social networking got me connected with relevant people and in a couple of years; I was writing full-length stories. Soon those stories got broadcasted over radio.

Today when I talk to myself, I understand more than ever before that “Everyone has some talent; WE just need to give it a chance.”

Materialistically perhaps I may not be in the top bracket, but emotionally I am, because the traveler in me is happy with the roads taken. The transition of a Corporate Professional into a Entrepreneur and then into a Writer has been a beautiful experience . If given a chance to relive my life, I would live it in exactly same way.

I took the road less traveled and I am proud of it.

About the Author

Rashmi is a Graduate from the Delhi University. After a corporate career spanning more than 12 years in Recruitment, she decided to go solo. Currently she runs a Staffing Consultancy firm “Matrix Solutions”, which specializes in Non IT Engineering vertical. Rashmi is also an amateur writer, mainly writing short stories. Her stories feature on the popular radio show “Yaadon ka Idiot box with Neelesh Misra” on Big FM.

Why do lesser number of Women Grow Professionally?

Have you ever wondered why do lesser number of women grow professionally? Is it their own doing that stops them or their circumstances that stop them? Or both? Most of the women start their career with same ambitions as men but recede somewhere in the middle of their career and sometimes even earlier. What holds them back? Were they not efficient to take the work load? Certainly not… they are as good and as competent as anyone else.

Men always work and they keep working and grow professionally all through their life… but a woman has to play many other roles along with her professional role. Over time her personal life and other responsibilities take precedence over her professional life.

Interestingly, a women’s life changes in slices of four to five years on an average!

How?

First comes the journey of acquiring professional qualification(s). During these years she dreams of becoming a successful professional with a lot more independence and exposure to various countries and cultures. This followed by a time slice for pursuit of professional growth and personal goals. She works head down with a quest to learn, progress and excel.

Barely does a woman settle in her professional life marriage pressures start knocking at her door. So the next time slice is dedicated towards the process of marriage and settling down in the new family and culture. This phase, for lots of women, also brings complexities related to relocation, job change or taking a sabbatical. This is when her career aspirations start taking a back seat …… Willingly or unwillingly! That followed by phases of completing family to mission admission to schooling to managing kids’ extracurricular activities to tuitions to …… and it goes on!

In cases where additional income or a stable job is a call of the day, the scenario is even more complex. One has to juggle with another heavy ball (of job) in the air. In either case, professional aspirations of the woman take a hit.

A woman too wants to continue work and grow. Many of you would agree that no matter whether we grow professionally or not but our homes can’t run without us. We can still refuse to grow professionally but at home we have to take charge and be active all the time. Many women might choose to continue with a low profile. They will never raise their hands to take challenges because if they do they might have to ignore their family.

That said, some women are more determined and keep their zest alive and consistently grow professionally. These successful women also have challenges so how did they manage it? Can we learn something from them on how to be courageous and follow our dreams? Can we observe them on how to own our lives and careers? Is it possible that we also keep our dreams alive and add professional life to our regular life?

I believe it is possible, it’s just a matter of knowing and learning HOW?

About the Author

Lata Singh Dasila is a Lead Technical Writer by profession. She has lead the technical writer teams in various organization. She has also written Computer text books for school children aged 3 to 14 years. She is constantly working on balancing her work life along with nurturing her 5 year old daughter. She is passionate about her work. She loves connecting with people who are positive in nature.

FAQs

  • What is different in this initiative?

    MTW initiative is different on the following aspects:

    1. Panel of mentors are all established leaders in their field
    2. All the mentors passionately believe in the cause of promoting more women to take up senior leadership roles in the industry
    3. The panel of mentors have ‘been there done that’ and hence will mentor based on their personal experience
    4. MTW is a platform to empower and enable WISE to follow their dream careers.
    5. MTW is not a platform for promoting people or business
    6. MTW is NOT a JOB portal and soliciting for jobs will be categorically discouraged
  • Why mentoring?

    Mentoring allows the mentees to get different perspective of their challenges and situation. It also provides access to consult professionals who have faced similar situations and have managed them successfully. The challenges could be around Identity Conflict, culture, tacit guilt of professional decisions taken in the past, conflict between decisions taken.
  • Who should sign up?

    Women Entrepreneurs, Women professionals aspiring for Senior leadership roles, women returning from sabbatical, women professionals contemplating on going on sabbatical.
  • How will I benefit?

    MTW initiative provides a platform to get advice on upskilling as well as handholding in the form of mentoring. It also provides a platform for networking with other WISE. The combination of these will enable women to pursue their dreams of a fulfilling career.
  • Why men mentors?

    Men mentors on the panel, strongly believe in the cause and will contribute in 3 ways, namely-

    1. They will be a source of inspiration for other men to understand the challenges and aspirations of professional WOMEN better.
    2. They will be catalysts in changing the stereotypical mind-sets of other men.
    3. During the course of mentoring, men mentors will be able to share perspectives of other men with the WISE
  • How can I contribute?

    You can share your success stories and how you overcame specific challenges successfully for other women to draw inspirations from. In addition, you can also refer other women who need guidance to join this initiative and benefit from it.
  • Confidentiality?

    All the information shared by the WISE will remain absolutely confidential unless the WISE herself wants the information to be shared with other WISE for the purpose of networking.
  • Will the mentors help find (better) jobs ?

    NO. This initiative is strictly meant for seeking guidance. Requesting mentors to refer the WISE for jobs is not in the scope of this initiative.